Seven Years Ago Today

Seven years ago today....

I arrived to my job at a nonprofit organization and heard the news that Massachusetts' highest court had ruled that, when it comes to marriage, it was illegal to discriminate on the basis of sexual orientation.  Six months from that date, same-sex marriage was going into effect in Massachusetts.  It was SUCH a big deal, such an amazing day!  

A few months after the ruling, I decided to open It's About Time (now 14 Stories) as the first gay wedding planner in the U.S..  I can't believe I've had my business for almost 7 years!

Now we have four other states and D.C. with legal same-sex marriage.  I can't wait for the day when all of the same-sex couples in the United States have this right.  While the weddings are so much fun and totally great, and we love love love our clients - we also feel like we're part of the marriage equality movement, and that is just so exciting.

Check out the links to some great organizations that promote marriage equality nationwide:

American Foundation for Equal Rights
GLAD
Human Rights Campaign
Marriage Equality USA

Where were you seven years ago today?
Leave A Comment | Permalink | POSTED: Thursday, November 18, 2010

Your Gay Wedding in a Church or Chapel

There is something in the air this week.  I had a wedding this past Saturday at Old South Church and heard from three other couples just this week, also interested in a church ceremony.  That's pretty unusual for me as most of my clients prefer secular ceremonies, but I'm really psyched because I absolutely love a church wedding.

Jen and I grew up Catholic and the sense of ritual and tradition that goes along with the ceremony is something that deeply resonates with both of us...

Here's an amateur photo from Saturday's wedding of the Boston Gay Men's Chorus warming up at Old South.  Why or why not would you want to have your same-sex wedding ceremony in a church?

Leave A Comment | Permalink | POSTED: Wednesday, September 08, 2010

Portia de Rossi's Changing Her Last Name - Are You?

Portia de Rossi filed paperwork to have her last name legally changed to DeGeneres to match her wife, Ellen DeGeneres.

They've been legally married for two years now.  The process of changing one's name is pretty easy if you live in a state where gay marriage is legal and you are legally married.  All you have to do is show the certified copy of your marriage certificate to the Social Security administration, then the RMV, then everywhere else.  You're golden.  

If you live in a state where gay marriage is not legal, in all likelihood, you'll have to change your name through the court system.  I actually had a couple tell me that they were denied a name change by a homophobic judge.  It's not just but that's the way it is for now, as long as DOMA stands.

Are you planning to have your name changed when you get married?
Leave A Comment | Permalink | POSTED: Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Gay Marriage Comes to Argentina

Gay marriage was just legalized in Argentina - the first country in Latin America.  This video clip sums it up well:


and the BBC has a great Q&A to help you understand the law.

Give us a minute to brush up on our Spanish, but yes, we'll travel!  :-)
Leave A Comment | Permalink | POSTED: Thursday, July 22, 2010

Six Years Ago Today

Gay marriage first became legal in Masschusetts


Photo by Marilyn Humphries
Leave A Comment | Permalink | POSTED: Monday, May 17, 2010

Rights and Responsibilities of Marriage p3

We're very pleased to present the seventh in a series of articles about legal resources for same-sex couples.  Our goal is to make sure that your gay or lesbian family is protected, both as you plan your gay wedding and continue your lives together.  The article below was written by Claire Bartholome, who in addition to being an estate planning attorney, is also a client of 14 Stories.

Recognition of marriage confers hundreds of benefits applying not only to spouses, but to family and next of kin as well. With those rights, however, come responsibilities, and while we celebrate gains in equality no matter the consequences, same-sex couples should understand what true marriage “recognition” will mean for them.  Over the next few weeks I will be discussing the mixed consequences of marital recognition for same-sex couples. 

This week: rights to health insurance benefits.  While married individuals are now entitled to extend employer-based health benefits to same-sex spouses in Massachusetts, it may not always be in the couple’s best interest.   

  • Generally, employer-based health insurance, even if it requires the employee to contribute to the cost of premiums, provides a significant tax savings since the employee’s portion is purchased with pre-tax dollars.  Federal law, however, considers the amount spent on providing health insurance coverage to a same-sex spouse is taxable income, so same-sex couples often owe more in taxes than their opposite-sex counterparts.
  • There is one exception to the general rule of federal taxation. If a same-sex spouse qualifies as a “dependent” under IRS rules without regard to his or her status as a spouse, the value of the benefit to the “dependent” is not taxed as wages to the employee.  Also, in states that recognize the marriages of same-sex couples, there is no state income tax on the value of spousal health insurance benefits.
  • Some same-sex couples actually pay less overall by maintaining separate health insurance coverage either through employers or by purchasing individual plans.  In Massachusetts, individuals can compare the cost and coverage of health insurance plans online at www.mahealthconnector.org.
  • LGBT Families must also consider how to cover dependent children.  If parents maintain two separate health insurance plans, they must research the impact of adding children to either plan.  Note also that if the children were not born to one of the spouses during the marriage or if only one spouse is the children’s legal parent, the non-parent spouse will not be able to add the children to her health insurance plan.
  • If same-sex couples receive benefits through an employer-sponsored domestic partnership plan, specifically for unmarried couples, then marriage may disqualify an individual from benefits. Same-sex couples should check in advance with employers to ensure that they are covered one way or another.
 
Being treated as a married couple for the purposes of obtaining health insurance is tempered by continued discrimination on the part of the federal government and some employers.  These challenges, however, will continue to be a part of the fight for equality … for better or for worse.

Claire Bartholome is an Attorney with the Law Office of William J. Brisk.  Her practice specializes in estate planning for same-sex couples in order to combat discrimination, legal challenges, and prejudice.  This information is not intended to provide legal advice.  For information as to how the laws apply to your specific situation, consult an attorney.  www.briskelderlaw.com

Leave A Comment | Permalink | POSTED: Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Wish Upon a Wedding

There is a great organization that grants wedding wishes to couples where one party has a terminal illness, regardless of sexual orientation.  It's right in their mission statement:  Wish Upon a Wedding is dedicated to granting weddings and/or civil union ceremonies at destinations across the United States to couples who are facing terminal illness.

If you know anyone who would love their wedding wish granted, read through the information below!



Leave A Comment | Permalink | POSTED: Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Rights and Responsibilities of Marriage p2

We're very pleased to present the sixth in a series of articles about legal resources for same-sex couples.  Our goal is to make sure that your gay or lesbian family is protected, both as you plan your gay wedding and continue your lives together.  The article below was written by Claire Bartholome, who in addition to being an estate planning attorney, is also a client of 14 Stories.

Recognition of marriage confers hundreds of benefits applying not only to spouses, but to family and next of kin as well. With those rights, however, come responsibilities, and while we celebrate gains in equality no matter the consequences, same-sex couples should understand what true marriage “recognition” will mean for them.  Over the next few weeks I will be discussing the mixed consequences of marital recognition for same-sex couples. 

This week: spouses’ rights to inherit property.  Generally, if an individual dies without a Will, his or her estate will be automatically distributed to a spouse and any issue or kindred (children or other family members).  In states that recognize same-sex marriage, these rules apply equally to opposite-sex or same-sex couples.  If an individual dies with a 
Will, however, she or he cannot completely disinherit a spouse unless the couple signed a valid prenuptial agreement. As a result, a spouse is entitled to a share of the estate.  This can introduce complications that have traditionally faced only opposite-sex couples.  

  • In Massachusetts and Connecticut, a marriage revokes all previous Wills unless they were made specifically in contemplation of a marriage.  Many same-sex couples previously drafted legal documents to protect one another and are now marrying later in life.  If they wish to distribute assets according to their own wishes, not according to prescribed state statute, they must complete new Wills after marriage.
  • Keep in mind, however, that before gay marriage became legal, same-sex couples could omit a partner from a Will in order to benefit other children, individuals, or charities.  Now that they are married, a spouse is entitled to a share of the estate even if she or he were omitted from the earlier Will.  Certain government benefits, including MassHealth in Massachusetts, will consider the refusal of a spousal share as a gift to the other beneficiaries named in the Will, with dramatic consequences for eligibility (see last week’s post).
  • Same-sex couples with significant assets must also remember that federal estate tax law, and the federal definition of marriage, determines whether married couples can make tax-free transfers between spouses.  Therefore, while an individual can leave hers or his entire estate to an opposite-sex spouse, which will only be taxed upon the death of the second spouse, this benefit is not available to same-sex married couples.
Remember, unmarried same-sex couples or couples in states that do not provide marriage equality may still provide for a partner in a Will.  The presumption where there is not a valid marriage is for the individual’s parents or siblings to benefit when an individual dies without a Will.  A non-married or non-recognized same-sex partner will be completely ignored as a matter of law. 

Being treated as a married couple for the purposes of inheritance requires thoughtful planning, and the benefits of recognition are tempered by continued discrimination on the part of the federal government.  These challenges, however, will continue to be a part of the fight for equality … for better or for worse.

Claire Bartholome is an Attorney with the Law Office of William J. Brisk.  Her practice specializes in estate planning for same-sex couples in order to combat discrimination, legal challenges, and prejudice.  This information is not intended to provide legal advice.  For information as to how the laws apply to your specific situation, consult an attorney.  www.briskelderlaw.com

Leave A Comment | Permalink | POSTED: Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Rights and Responsibilities of Marriage

We're very pleased to present the fifth in a series of articles about legal resources for same-sex couples.  Our goal is to make sure that your gay or lesbian family is protected, both as you plan your gay wedding and continue your lives together.  The article below was written by Claire Bartholome, who in addition to being an estate planning attorney, is also a client of 14 Stories.

A marriage gives you automatic inclusion within and under hundreds of state laws that apply to spouses, family, and next of kin. With the rights of marriage, however, come responsibilities, and while we celebrate gains in equality no matter the consequences, same-sex couples should understand what true marriage “recognition” will mean for them.  Over the next few weeks I will be discussing situations where marital recognition may have mixed consequences for same-sex couples. 

This week: eligibility for long-term care coverage under Medicaid.  In Massachusetts, same-sex spouses now have full marital recognition for MassHealth, the state Medicaid program, which can have positive or negative effects depending on the relative wealth of the spouses.   

  • MassHealth views the couple’s combined assets in order to determine eligibility, so if the healthier spouse has significant personal wealth, he or she will need to spend down countable assets until they total less than approximately $112,000 (not including a home worth less than $750,000) in order for the less healthy spouse to qualify for coverage.
  • On the other hand, if the couple’s combined countable assets are $112,000 or less, the spouse in need of long-term care will qualify for MassHealth.  If the couple were not considered married for the purposes of MassHealth, the spouse in need of care would have to spend down to $2,000 before he or she would qualify and would not be able to transfer any assets to a non-married partner.
  • Generally, if an individual were to transfer assets to someone other than a spouse within 5 years of applying for MassHealth coverage, he or she would be subject to a disqualification period of 1 day for every $267 transferred.  Since same-sex marriages are recognized, spouses are allowed to transfer assets between themselves freely without incurring a disqualification period. 
  • Coupled with Federal gift tax law, however, transferring assets between same-sex spouses may still incur tax liability.  An individual can transfer $13,000 per year to any person, but when significant asset transfers are on the line, taxes may be imposed.  Each person can transfer up to $1,000,000 in a lifetime, but each gift made during life is deducted from that total.  While the Federal government provides that “married” persons can transfer assets freely between one another without gift tax liability, this applies only to opposite-sex spouses as a matter of Federal law.

Being treated as a married couple for the purposes of MassHealth requires much more planning than if spouses are considered separately, and the benefits of recognition are tempered by continued discrimination on the part of the Federal Government.  These challenges, however, will continue to be a part of the fight for equality … for better or for worse.

    Claire Bartholome is an Attorney with the Law Office of William J. Brisk.  Her practice specializes in estate planning for same-sex couples in order to combat discrimination, legal challenges, and prejudice.  This information is not intended to provide legal advice.  For information as to how the laws apply to your specific situation, consult an attorney.  www.briskelderlaw.com

    Leave A Comment | Permalink | POSTED: Wednesday, March 17, 2010

    The Most Popular Reading at a Gay Wedding Ceremony

    The most popular reading during gay wedding ceremonies has tremendous meaning. It's historical. It's beautifully written.  It speaks volumes about the significance of a marriage.  And it was written by a lawyer...

    Well, a judge actually.  The most popular reading during gay wedding ceremonies is part of the ruling which legalized gay marriage in Massachusetts (the first state to have legal gay marriage).  It was written by Judge Margaret Marshall from the State Supreme Judicial Court.  While this is by no means the whole ruling, the passage below is the long version and  is often excerpted into smaller chunks:

    "Marriage is a vital social institution. The exclusive commitment of two individuals to each other nurtures love and mutual support; it brings stability to our society. For  those who choose to marry, and for their children, marriage provides an abundance of legal, financial, and social benefits. In return it imposes weighty legal, financial, and social obligations....Without question, civil marriage enhances the "welfare of the community." It is a "social institution of the highest importance." ...

    Marriage also bestows enormous private and social advantages on those who choose to marry. Civil marriage is at once a deeply personal commitment to another human being and a highly public celebration of the ideals of mutuality, companionship, intimacy, fidelity, and family.... Because it fulfils yearnings for security, safe haven, and  connection that express our common humanity, civil marriage is an esteemed institution, and the decision whether and whom to marry is among life's momentous acts of self-definition."

    I hope you consider including a piece of history in your wedding ceremony.

    Have you written your wedding ceremony yet or are you using a script provided by your officiant?

    Leave A Comment | Permalink | POSTED: Thursday, March 11, 2010

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